Avoiding the Zingers of Unhappy Relationships

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:51:08 +0000

October 25
Free workshop presented by Timothy J. Furness, LCPC, LMFT
Monday, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
Changing the pattern of criticism and defensiveness in your relationship is essential to its long-term stability and success. While empathy and understanding go a long way toward maintaining a healthy connection with your partner, it is the zingers, the negative behaviors, which are truly destructive. Tim will explore some of the negative ways many couples inadvertently use to communicate with each other and find healthier, more useful ways of communicating to help insure the long term stability and success of your relationship.

Monthly Conversations: Parenting Separation & Divorce: After the Beginning

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:50:33 +0000

November 8
Free presentation sponsored by Jefferson St. Counseling & Consulting
2nd Monday of Every Month, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
After surviving countless changes in early separation or divorce, numerous other challenges may emerge only later. Decisions about changing schools and housing, splitting holidays, renewed dating– and of course the ongoing coparenting with your “ex”- can all raise new questions and doubts. Learn concrete tips and considerations in facing these new challenges, so you can make your own family’s adjustment smoother for children and parents alike. November’s topic: presented by Stephen H. Hill, Ph.D.

Principles of Parenting from A to Z

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:49:57 +0000

November 12 & 13
2-day workshop presented by Lorn Adkins, LCPC, LMFT
Friday, 6:00pm – 8:30pm & Saturday, 9:00am – 3:00pm
Registration cost: $240 individual/ $360 couples*
Registration will close: October 29.
* A couple is any two people concerned about the same child.
Parenting is the most important job for which we receive no formal training. This class will utilize new brain research about parenting a child from the inside out. Parents will also learn developmental stages of growth that are necessary for a healthy childhood. Why is it that we invest our time and money in so many places, but not in helping us become better parents? Contact Heather @ 385-0888 for further details.

Outsmart The Winter Blues

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:49:15 +0000

October 21
Free workshop presented by Dr. Sara Rodgers
Thursday, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
Dr. Sara Rodgers, Naturopathic Physician, and Susan Reuling Furness team up to introduce you to health practices that will make this winter a winner. Learn to make helpful, healthful food and supplements choices. Discover the best activities to ward off Seasonal Affect Disorder (a.k.a. SAD.) Uncover more effective ways to keep your mind on a bright and upbeat channel during the long days of winter. We want you to enjoy springtime in December.

Sara Rodgers, NMD, is a Licensed Naturopathic Physician practicing in Boise, Idaho. The foundation of her general medicine naturopathic practice is to treat the whole person by utilizing nutrition, herbs, supplementation, cleansing, and lifestyle changes. She has written numerous articles which can be found at www.boisenaturalhealth.com

Monthly Conversations: Successful Stepfamilies: Maintaining Our Loving Marriage

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:48:43 +0000

October 11
Free presentation sponsored by Jefferson St. Counseling & Consulting
2nd Monday of Every Month, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
Every successful stepfamily takes time to develop. And every couple faces particular challenges in their relationship that only stepfamilies can provide. Come and explore some of the steps for success in your own marriage, meet those challenges head on, and enrich your stepfamily home environment.
October’s topic: presented by Timothy J. Furness, LCPC, LMFT

Monthly Conversation: How To Parent In Cyberspace

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:25:55 +0000

September 13, 2010
Free presentation sponsored by Jefferson St. Counseling & Consulting
2nd Monday of Every Month, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
Today’s technology has opened new vistas for our children and new challenges for parenting. How can parents leave the door open for learning and knowledge and still protect and guide them in a world with few appropriate boundaries? New studies reveal (surprise, surprise) the best protection comes from parents and caregivers who understand technology and understand how to set limits and boundaries. This class is intended to help guide parents in this other reality of parenting.
September’s topic presented by Lorn H. Adkins, LCPC, LMFT.

the write path: Writing Life Stories: A class for men and women

admin — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 20:21:12 +0000

September 13

who want to remember yesterday and shape tomorrow.

7-week group facilitated by Susan Reuling Furness, M.Ed., PTR

Mondays, 5:15pm – 6:45pm, Sept.13 – Nov.1 (no group on Sept. 27)

Registration cost: $245 after Sept. 6.

Writing about your life helps make your life more satisfying. Research even suggests that those who write down their memories live longer than those who do not. Join us to preserve good memories and make sense of the chaotic and tragic ones. No writing experience required.

Rightsize Your Life

admin — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 21:23:04 +0000

September 20
Free workshop presented by Lori Davies with Perfect Order
Monday, 7:00pm – 8:30pm
In this program, Lori Davies will show you how to get started downsizing-or rightsizing your life including your physical possessions and treasures, paper, your to-do list, activities, etc. Learn how and why to pare down your possessions to fit your lifestyle.

the write path: Writing The Winds of Change: Women’s Journaling Group

admin — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 21:22:15 +0000

September 15
7-week group facilitated by Susan Reuling Furness, M.Ed., PTR
Wednesdays, 9:00am – 11:00am, Sept. 15 – Nov. 3 (no group on Sept. 29)
Registration cost: $300
Join Us As We Explore Life’s Transitions. Regardless of the source of your loss or change, your own words of wisdom help you navigate and discover a bright tomorrow. Join other women as we untangle the confusion, upheaval, and mystery of riding and writing the winds of change.
Let go of the past. Trust yourself through transition. Find optimism about change and new life adventures. No need to be a “writer.” The group provides the tools and encouragement to help you thrive. * Ask about insurance reimbursement, scholarships, and senior discounts.

September 2010 newsletter

admin — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 21:07:11 +0000

I Can’t Decide Blues
“Make up your mind,” mother’s voice reverberates in my memory.
“But I can’t,” I replied. We were standing in the candy store in Ocean City. Fingerprints of the children who decided before me decorate the glass case, which is filled with chocolate creams, chocolate covered cherries, marzipan, taffy, toffee, and truffles.
Decision-making challenges us throughout our lives. We face decisions daily. Some seem relatively easy. Others are of greater consequence. Still in each case we have only two choices – to do nothing or to decide and then proceed.
When we sing the I Can’t Decide Blues, our discordant thoughts and feelings collide, creating stress and anxiety. Paralysis sets in and the hair pulling begins. “I’d love a rich chocolate cream, but what if it has a nasty center? I like taffy, but if I choose that I won’t get chocolate.” This is the beginning of the What If Blues. “What if I make the wrong decision? What if I regret my choice? What if other people don’t like my decision? What if I just sit here and hope that someone else makes the decision.” If we prolong our decision and agony, someone else is likely to make the call. “She can’t decide, so just give her one of those old hard candies at the back of the case.”
Maybe these pointers will help you in resolving dilemmas.
First – Get away from your problem. You will think more clearly outside your daily routine. For a big decision, spend a weekend alone. Pack your heart and a journal to help you get in touch with your feelings. Leave behind data, documents, and checklists.
Second – Use emotional intelligence to help with an important decision. This means paying attention to the song in your heart. Emotional intelligence does not involve knee-jerk reactions. It means, instead, observing your feelings (try checking for tightness in your stomach or chest) and using the information to make an informed decision. Tightness and heaviness typically mean the choice is threatening. A relaxed response or calmness foretells a better outcome. Follow your emotions as you envision yourself after a potential choice. Do you relax or grow tighter? Your body knows what choice will work for you.
Finally – Base your decision on what is best for you. When you ignore your needs, everyone loses. Sometimes we must make a sacrifice, but if you always choose for the benefit of the “other,” you’ll soon be singing The Resentment Blues.
Let’s assume you want to break an engagement, but decide to marry because you don’t want to hurt your fiancée’s feelings. You will soon sing I’ve Got a No-Good Woman while she sings My Man Don’t Love Me Nomore. The sacrifice for another person ruins the music for everyone. On the other hand, if you consider your need to find a more suitable partner, the unhappiness ends. You and your former fiancée can both sing to someone else in the future.
Making up your mind requires that you respect your right to sing good music throughout your life. If you need help with a decision, ask someone who also respects this right. Find a helper who will help you listen to your strongest wants and desires. But don’t wait forever, unless you have a taste for the blues and the hard candy at the back of the case.

Sue Reuling Furness 7/21/03